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| Be the board, not one of the pieces! |
I have to start by saying that I love this book! I have enjoyed every chapter and know that, although I am familiar with many of the themes in this book, I loved the way that they were presented in this book. It also served to remind me that I need to live in the moment and give the situation I find myself in it’s due; it is what it is! Judgement and bitterness over situations we find ourselves in serves nobody, especially me.
The idea of enrollment is very enticing to me. You know it when you see it, but it is something that almost always is seen in person. Zander writes, “ Enrollment is the art and practice of generating a spark of possibility for others to share.” This is what we hope to share with our students. I think enrollment is what launches a good teacher to a great teacher because they are able to launch their students into the mindset of possibility.
The chapter on being the board was the hardest for me to understand, but once I got the idea that it was really about taking the responsibility of being a part of the situation. It isn’t about taking all of the responsibility for the situation or blame. It is about seeing what part you did have in the situation and what can be done to alleviate the blame game. What can be done to get the participants in the situation back in the same game. By taking the responsibility of being the board, you are able to see the situation for what it is, minus any blame or resentment. If both participants take the stance of being the board the situation is more likely to be solved in a mutually beneficial way. It becomes a WE story instead of an I story. What can WE do about this so that we can both find a suitable solution for everyone.
You did a wonderful job synthesizing the last four chapters of the book. I like your explanation of being the board. It really would be ideal if we could all think that way. It would be a win-win for all, wouldn't it? I love the phrase "It is what it is." When we take things personally, we do ourselves so much harm and end up creating a situation that is much worse than it truly is. Like you said, it's the judgement and bitterness that ultimates hurts us.
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ReplyDeleteLove this book! I purchased the hard copy for future reading. I have not adjusted to reading everything on a computer, I like the feel of paper.
ReplyDeleteBeing the board is a hard concept to digest. The chapter rings true. It made me look at a couple situations that have gone awry. It also reminded me when I coached the girls golf team our motto "Be the Ball", now I can apply this concept to life "Be the Board"..
Being the board is one of the hardest concepts to grasp because we have a difficult releasing our need for fairness and responsibility. It's a bit like "Getting an A" in that no one is getting anything for free. But we're changing our focus so that those of us who may have suffered harm can take back our lives and, not remove responsibility from the others, but shut off that path into our lives so that we can free reconstruct and heal ourselves. It's difficult to see the differences or benefits.
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